Granny

Granny aka Irene Campbell entered this world on July 16, 1930 and she left us on New Year's Eve, 2012.  The word that I can best use to describe Granny is "humble".  She was the type of person who would never ever make her needs known.  She lived a very simple life.  She was born in Syracuse, New York.  She was the youngest of seven children.  Her father was a farmer.  Her mother left the family when she was just a small child.  Her father unable to provide care to the young children placed Granny and her next two youngest siblings in foster care.  During the Fall of 2011 when Granny lived in our home we had many late night talks and she shared some details of her childhood with me.  She was often abused and neglected.  She described to me being in one foster home which had biological children.  She said the family had parties and would serve "a huge spread of food".   She said she and the other foster children would just be given bread and sent to an upstairs room and that they could not participate in the party. She described walking in feet deep snow as a child to carry papers for a paper route.  She had a very limited education.  She knew poverty as a child.  She told me that she left foster care as soon as she was able.  She lived with several different sisters and ended up in Arizona.

She married and gave birth to Billy and his sister Carolyn in San Diego.  Their father was in the Navy there.  They divorced shortly after.  Billy was three or four years old and his sister one year younger.   Granny never ever remarried.  She said that she would never put a man before her children. Granny never drove a car.  She had no job skills.  Last night between sobs Billy said to me that his mother "could make anything out of nothing".  He told me they often had flour and water pancakes for dinner.  He has described to me how one Christmas Eve the mailman came to the door to deliver mail and noted that Granny was crying.  She was crying because she had no toys to give her children for Christmas.  The mailman returned with used toys for them.  Billy has told me that in one apartment they lacked heat.  He said their bedroom was actually a back porch.  He and his mother and sister all shared a bed.  He told me that they would go to sleep as soon as it was dark so that they would stay warm.  Billy has told me that during middle school his shoes became so torn that he could no longer wear them.  The school discovered why he was missing school and bought him his first ever pair of penny loafers complete with a shiny penny.  He told me how proud he was of those shoes.  He tells me of having only one pair of jeans at one point in his life.  He said his mother washed them out in the bathtub every night so that he would be clean the next day.  Billy has detailed his mother taking in neighbor's laundry and ironing  for fifteen cents a piece to try and provide for him and his sister.  Billy has told me that they were not allowed to go into a store unless they had money to make a purchase.  He said Granny felt that it was wrong.  He said on Sunday they would walk and "window shop" so that they could see the items in the stores. Later in Billy's teenage years he has told me that Granny got a job pumping gasoline near their home.  He told me she worked very long hours for basically pennies.   He has always refused to accept money when people have tried to pay him for helping them.  He always says "My Mom told me not to take money from people when I do something for them".  I have heard him say this many times.  I could tell more but this hopefully gives a clear picture of the life they led. Billy has told me that would not trade his childhood for anything in the entire world. It has made him who he is today.  He had a mother's love - Granny's love.

We have also known Granny's love.  My life and that of my children have been blessed by having her in our lives.  She played a major role in helping Billy to raise Rachel.  When Billy and I married she graciously welcomed us into their family.  She told me one day that she had told Billy that she "would not have to worry about him anymore because she knew that I would take care of him".  Yes, Granny I have and I will continue to take care of your son.  She loved my Thomas.  He would go to her house after school and she would make sure he started on his homework. Andrea spent much time with Granny and Rachel prior to Billy and me getting married. Andrea LOVED Granny's lemon chicken.  Andrea always said, "Granny, when are you going to make me some lemon chicken?"  Granny would always laugh.  In Granny's last days at the nursing home she was hallucinating and seeing Andrea and Rachel as teenagers.  She told me they were still "laid up in the bed".  I told her she better go wake them up and that Andrea would probably want her to cook some lemon chicken.  She laughed then.  When at her house she would not only cook she would prepare the plates and bring them directly to you.  I have seen one of the children not like what she cooked and she would get up and go cook another meal for them.  One time I had a virus and soiled my clothing while driving to her house after work.  I went in and told her and immediately changed clothes.  She came to get the clothes from me to wash.  I told her to please let me do it.  She refused to let me and took them to clean.  Granny ALWAYS put others above herself.

Granny led a very simple life.  She did not like to leave home very often. Billy always said this is because she did not have money and did not want anyone to have to pay her way.  Her pleasures were watching Alabama football and watching the cable television news.  I always jokingly called her "Mrs. Spann" (for those reading this not from our local area James Spann is our local TV meteorologist).  She could always tell you exactly what the weather forecast was and exactly what was going on in the news.

Granny's life changed on 9/4/2011 when rains from Tropical Storm Lee flooded her home.  She came to our home that night and remained through the end of October.  Her daughter Carolyn had lived with her since August of 2006.  We had not realized how severe Granny's dementia had progressed until she was living in our home.  We loved Granny and gave it our best shot at maintaining her in our household but it was readily apparent that she required more custodial and medical care than we were able to give.  During this time we learned that she had not been taken for medical care for 3 1/2 years.  Granny was wandering during the night.  She was hallucinating and would have yelling and screaming spells.  We  have two flights of stairs in our home and we were fearful that she would fall.  She would open our back door in the middle of the night to let her dog out and go outside.  We feared for her safety.  We had no one else to help us with her.  I homeschooled the girls then and now.  They were unable to sleep and had become extremely difficult to manage due to the stress in our home.  I consulted my brother's wife, Amy, who worked in a nursing home.  She recommended that I contact the geriatric psychiatry unit at Princeton for help.  I called and she was admitted.  She had a two week stay and was started on medication for dementia.  The hospital psychiatrist and the social worker emphatically told us that Granny could NOT be left alone and that she required 24 hour supervision.  We did not have the financial resources to provide for full time around the clock in hour care for nursing home was our only option.  It was a painful decision for us but when we were instructed by the hospital staff it was out of our hands.

Granny went to Self Nursing home and was placed on the dementia unit.  There were eleven other little ladies her age.  She thrived and was happier than we had ever seen her in her life.  For those of you who know Granny it is will known that she was a no-frills kind of lady.  She wore no jewelry, no make-up, only wore jeans and t-shirts or sweatshirts, and her hair was straight and pulled back in a ponytail.  The first week at the nursing home we were there one night visiting her.  She looked at him and said "Billy will you give me money to get a perm?" I wanted to fall out of my chair.  I looked around and all the little ladies had short permed hair! Peer pressure was still strong at eighty years old.  Granny got that perm and several others after that and looked beautiful.

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving and Christmas with her in 2011.  In January she developed a severe UTI and pneumonia.  We thought we were losing her then.  She never fully recovered and continued to decline.  It was extremely painful for us to watch.  Dementia is a cruel disease.  You see the body of the person you love but the person you love starts to gradually go absent.

Billy has been the most devoted son that I have ever seen in my life.  When Granny was at our house he would very gently help her hang her head over our kitchen sink and he would wash her hair.  He would help her to get in and out of the bath tub.  When she was in the hospital she was fearful at night.  For weeks on end he would work all day long and then go straight to the hospital in his dirty work clothes.  He would sleep in a chair.  He would leave the hospital in time to come home and shower and go right back to work only to repeat the same scenario the next day.  I offered multiple times to go stay with her and let him stay home and rest but he said "She is my responsibility".  He very rarely missed a night going to the nursing home.  In the last months she would not eat dinner if he did not go to feed her.  He would work all day and then go straight to the nursing home.  He would stand at his mother's bedside and encourage her to intake enough calories to sustain her life.  He showed her the utmost love, honor, and respect during her life.  Prior to our marriage almost thirteen years ago now he told me that "no one would ever come before his mother".  He has a strong love for me but obviously his love for his mother was different.  He was letting me know how much she meant to him.

We knew when we left for China to adopt our precious newest angel Maya Grace that Granny was on hospice and that there was a possibility that she could leave us before we returned home.  I offered to travel alone to bring Maya Grace home but Billy wanted us to come as a family.  Many of you know our extremely difficult adoption journey.  We just could not let ourselves believe that God would take Granny while we were gone.  Rachel and the nursing home contacted us to let us know of Granny's decline.  We held on to the belief that she would improve.  This was not in God's plan.  When Billy knew of Granny's decline we began researching what it would take to get him home.  Due to the nature of our airline tickets we would have had to pay $300 plus the difference in the cost of the flight.  We were looking at this option yesterday when we learned that Granny had passed on from this life.  Due to the astronomical cost of holiday flights we had to come to China a few days early and must stay a few days later.  At this point Maya Grace is a Chinese citizen and will travel to the US on a Chinese passport with a US visa.  As of today we do not yet have permission for her to enter the US.  We had our consulate appt. this morning.  We must remain in China through 1/4.  To change the airline tickets for the five of us would cost around $6000 and we can not afford that cost.  Even though I have told Billy that I could manage the girls alone and that he could return home he refuses to leave us.  He said today that Granny is gone and that there is nothing more that he can do for her.  He told our guide today that he has lost Granny and that he can not risk leaving us and letting something happening to us too.  I have never seen him so distraught.  It is hard when you see your 6'4", 230 pound husband sobbing his eyes out.

Unfortunately there are those who are judging Billy and our family for not immediately coming home.  Unfortunately Facebook is a breeding ground for drama and we are seeing posts.  Being in a foreign country 6000 miles from home does not make it logistically easy to suddenly change plans especially when five people and an international adoption are involved.   Billy said that he knows that Granny would not want him leaving us.  I can not begin to understand God's timing but I am assured in His word that His timing is perfect.  Why God chose to have Granny leave us now I do not know.  We are trusting God to get us through.  We loved Granny and were completely devoted to her.  We were at her side continuously for the last year and a half.  She knew she was loved.  She would readily tell anyone that "Billy loves his Momma".  The body that remains is her shell.  When she took her last breath her soul and spirit went to heaven. We are very saddened for Rachel that she is having to bear the burden of burying Granny alone.  Our hearts are aching for her.  Billy is proud of the young woman that Rachel has become and of the maturity she has shown to pay proper respects to Granny. The funeral home would have held Granny's body until we return home on 1/9 but we did not feel it was fair to others who need to grieve and have closure to wait over a week.  We know that Granny is looking down on all of us.  We will see her again one day.  We are relieved that she is now healthy and whole and that she is not suffering.  She would not have wanted to live in that state that she was in.  We are finding joy thinking that she is being rejoined with her sisters and hoping that the "Bear" will cross her path quickly.  We love you Granny! You were one of a kind.  Oh, and Roll Tide!

Saturday

* I had said my next post would be on our orphanage visits but just not ready to write those now.

Saturday started early with the hotel breakfast buffet then we met our guide to return to the Guangzhou International Health Clinic to have Maya Grace's TB skin test read.  It was completely negative! Whew - sigh of relief.  Our guide then took us to a beautiful park - Liuhuahu Park.  All of the wonderful parks here truly make me envious.  There is a such a sense of community here due to the parks being a gathering spot for many.  There was no admission fee to the park but once again they offered carnival type rides for the children.  There was a very minimal cost for them.  As in the other park there were people playing badmitton, ping-pong, people doing tai-chi, people doing ballroom dancing, exercising in what I call an adult playground, etc.  There was a beautiful lake in the center which had boats for rent.  The girls had a great time riding a few rides and "exercising" with the locals.  Something I have not shared is how many "stares" we receive.  Especially toward the girls.  On numerous occasions people will literally stop and turn around and bend down to look in Mary Bailey and Anneli's faces.  This has happened especially with older ladies who look weathered as if they have had a hard life.  It has made me wonder if they are perhaps seeking and searching for a face - a face that has been abandoned, a little face that has haunted them and their families.  I will never know.  We were also concerned about the response we would receive toward Maya Grace due to the scars on her lip and her open palate.  If she throws her head back when laughing it is very visible. China treasures beauty and children with special needs are considered to be bad luck.  We have received nothing but positive responses toward her from the local people.  Here are photos from the park!

                                         A restaurant visible from across the lake at the park.

                                                   The adult exercise "playground".

No, your eyes are NOT deceiving you! This is an elderly gray-haired lady completly hanging upside down in the park! 

MORE LATER! 

A few of the rides! 

As we were leaving we watched people practicing ballroom dancing.  One of the ladies did not have a partner but that did not stop her! 

Leaving the park 

And I have to add a few of the "rule" signs located beside the rides!  Enlarge them to read.  You will find humor. 

After the park we had nap time.  We then went out to Jusco, the local Japanese large department store.  They have a great grocery section so we went to stock up on more snacks for the girls and yet more noodles and dumplings for dinner.  I think I am turning into rice and noodles! It was a fun day.

Thursday - Medical Exam

We met our guide early this morning for the purpose of traveling to the Guangzhou International Travel Health Care Center.  The clinic was extremely crowded with few seats being empty and many people standing.  I noted a group of women all dressed in bright pink pants and tops.  My first thought was that they were a team of some kind.  Our guide told us that everyone being seen at the clinic was there for the purpose of obtaining a medical to meet the requirement to be allowed to enter the USA.  It was humbling.  It was also surreal.  As mentioned the waiting area was extremely crowded and our guide ushered us by everyone to a cordoned off area with a sign that read "adoptive families only".  We were the only ones present.  Within minutes medical professionals appeared.  A nurse weighed and measured Maya Grace.  An MD asked me how her appetite was and I told him it was "HUGE".  The child will not stop eating.  This is normal for a child from an orphanage.  He then listened to her heart and lungs and both were reported fine.  I then placed her on the exam table and he looked her over in seconds.  We then waited back in the separate area.  After a short time we went into a room labeled "vaccinations".   A TB skin test was placed in Maya's left area.  She cried and it hurt my Mommy's heart.  We then went back in the separate area and then within minutes our guide took us to the Ear, Nose, Throat section.  A sat in a chair with her in my lap.  A toy was shaken at her ear and she turned toward it.  She fought against the man trying to look in her ear and there was absolutely no way that he did an accurate exam of them.  He then put a tongue depressor in her mouth and she fought him again and he looked for maybe one second.  After that we were finished.   We were told to return on Saturday for the TB skin test to be read.  OK FOLKS! America has something else they can learn from the Chinese people.  I mentioned the females in the bright pink suits and then I later saw men in blue ones.  Our guide told us that this is what patients are required to wear for their exams and for X-rays.  Each patient removes their street clothing and puts on the top and pant which resembles a track suit.  Why do we have to wear open backed hospital gowns when getting an exam or X-ray???? This would definitely be preferable!

After leaving we returned to Shamian Island.  It is so nice going here and it brings back so many happy memories of when we adopted Mary Bailey and Anneli.  We went in few shops.  For those traveling soon - A Gift from China accepts charge cards.  All proceeds from their sale goes to charity.  Jenny's shop accept American money.  A friend had asked us to pick up a dress for her daughter so we purchased one at Jenny's.  Jenny was very nice and friendly.  Across from her shop is a shop called Sherry's.  If you want squeaky shoes either of these would be excellent choices.  They are around $7-$8 US.  Jenny's silk dresses are $8.  As we had been eating noodles/rice/dumplings from the Jusco deli we wanted something different so we ate at Lucy's on the island.  This was the first restaurant where we ate after receiving Mary Bailey.  We clearly remembered ordering her the mashed potatoes from their "Baby Menu".  This was the first food we fed her.  We also ate there when adopting Li-Li.  It was fun feeding Maya Grace a bowl of mashed potatoes from Lucy's too!  I had a hamburger and fries.  The beef did not look like what I am used to in a hamburger. Not real sure what it was nor am I sure that I really want to know.

We returned to the hotel room for nap time.  I then took the girls to play in the hotel playroom while Billy went out for more noodles/rice/dumplings for dinner.  

Maya Grace is continuing to do beautifully.  She has fully attached to me and will let Billy feed her but if he tries to hold her she arches her back, whimpers, and searches for me.  She is sleeping with me and is sleeping all night long.  She naps well too.  She is jabbering and likely saying words but since we do not speak Mandarin or Cantonese we do now know what she is saying.  If we say simple words to her she will repeat them to us.   She is making eye contact with me for several seconds at a time.  She engages in play with toys.  The girls love her.  I have not seen any signs of jealousy with them at all.  Anneli told me that if you could have "100 presents for Christmas or Maya that she would choose Maya!"  Anneli also told me that she "did not realize that Maya would be so much fun".  I expected Maya to be larger than she is and more mature than she is.  Even though she is over 2 1/2 she is still so much like a baby.  She is still in diapers and the orphanage had not started potty training yet.  She is still on a bottle.  She will feed herself small items like Cheerios or Puffs but with other food we have to feed her.  I can't wait for each morning for her to wake up and for her to wake at nap time.  She has completely stolen my heart!  Oh and the child LOVES my cell phone.  She will point to it and say "aya" over and over which I assume means "give it to me now".  

My next post will be about our orphanage visit as I am still a few days behind on blogging.  It will be emotionally draining for me to compose but I must tell what I saw in hopes that others who read it may find it in their hearts to help the innocent ones still waiting.

Wednesday

Wednesday morning we met our guide and visited The Museum of the Mausoleum of the second Nanyue King, Zhao Mo.  Our guide explained that in the 1980s a successful businessman utilized the services of the feng shui master to locate the perfect location to construct a 5-Star hotel.  When excavating the area to build the hotel the 2000 year old tomb was discovered.  The Nanyue King was buried with fifteen human sacrifices and a massive amount of relics - 11,465 to be exact.  The human sacrifices included four concubines and a guard.  These were people that the king wished to have with him in the next life.  We were able to go down into the actual tomb.  There is a multi-level museum containing the relics.  We love history and museums so this was fascinating to us.  The remains of one of the concubines was showcased which looked like ashes and wood pieces.  The king actual teeth and jawbone were on display.  He was buried in a complete suit of jade and the actual jade had been re-laced together and was also on display.  The museum was dark as are many museums and flash photography was not allowed so I did not get many photos.

In the middle of all of the ancient history was a very modern play area.  The girls had fun playing in it while Billy continued browsing the museum.  Admission is 12 yuan and was included in the amount of money paid to our agency for our guide.

We returned to the hotel for Maya Grace to nap.  She is just the most perfect little angel.  She sucks two of her fingers while she sleeps.  It is absolutely adorable but sad at the same time.  This was obviously a learned way to self-soothe while being in the orphanage.

Daddy went to McDonald's and brought lunch back to the hotel.  Maya Grace likes chicken nuggets! We then ventured out on our own to a beautiful park. If you walk out to the left of the Garden Hotel stay on the left side of the street and continue past the McDonald's Pizza Hut and Tekila's  you come to a large intersection. Turn left.  You will then pass a hospital building on the left which says Aids Research.  You will see a pedestrian bridge which crosses over the road.  Cross the bridge and go left.  After you pass the bus stop area you see the gate to enter the park.  It is called Martyr's Park.  It is massive.  There was a children's area with amusement park rides and a large playground area.  It does not cost to enter the park but there was a small cost for the rides.

In the center of the park was a massive pavilion type structure.  There were men playing traditional Chinese instruments.  There were older people doing Tai Chi.  Younger people were seen playing badmitton.  There were men playing cards.  There was a place to rent boats to go out on the lake.  There was an outdoor exercise area for adults that looked like a large adult playground.  How I wish that there were places like this where we live.  There is such a sense of community and togetherness here among the people that we do not have in our community.  Here are the girls expending some energy.

We returned to the hotel before dark.  After dark beggars come out in the street.  It is extremely unsettling.  Billy went out for more noodles and the day was done!

Christmas Day and Official Adoption Day

First topic of the day was "SANTA".  Billy being the awesome Dad that he is slept on the floor in the living area of our suite.  There is a slide door to close off the bedroom/bathroom area.  All three girls and I slept in the bedroom.  I heard Mary Bailey cry out a few times during the night.  She does this fairly often but at one point I realized she was really crying.  I asked her what was wrong and she said that she was "scared that Santa would not come".  It was still dark outside but I told her to get up and see if he had been here! He had come and she was SO excited.  It was such a small Christmas materially than they usually receive but you would never have known.  They received a Chinese "Barbie" with clothes, one of those pillows that lights up and I can't think of what they are called now,  and numerous books and activity sets.  Maya Grace received a duplo block set, books, and flash cards! They went right to work playing.

We dressed the girls in their Christmas outfits.  We realized the cute red shoes that we had brought for Maya Grace were HUGE so she sported her also too large tennis shoes from the orphanage with her Christmas dress.  She did not care at all!  Photo in the lobby on the way to breakfast.

I will add here that Maya Grace went to sleep very easily and slept all night long.  She sucks two of her fingers on her right hand when going to sleep.  We had the breakfast buffet prior to meeting our guide.  This little one can eat.  She ate, and ate, and ate.  I finally stopped feeding her as I was afraid she would get sick in the van on the drive.  

We met our guide and drove to the Civil Affairs office.  On Monday when we received Maya Grace we signed a form to enter into the "Harmonious Period".  Today she officially became our daughter.  We went before a notary who asked why we wanted to adopt Wang Xiao Xing.  He asked how many biological children and adopted children we have.  There were a few other questions but I can't remember them.  We then went to the other official office.  She asked if we wanted to proceed with the adoption.  All papers were signed and we promised again to not abandon, abuse, nor discriminate against her.  We left with her being officially Maya Grace XiaoXing Campbell! 

I could not have asked God for a more perfect Christmas gift - that of a child.  A child very wanted and loved before she was ever placed in our arms.  From the time I was in high school I wanted a large family.  I love children.  One year after Andrea was born I became pregnant and had a miscarriage at 14 weeks.  I was never able to conceive a child afterwards.  I was extremely thankful for Andrea but grieved heavily that she was an only child.   When she was twelve Thomas entered our family via adoption.  Rachel entered our family when I married Billy.  We have three grandchildren.  To have three more blessings from China and knowing God's plan for my life all along brings me to tears.  My heart is so full.  

After Civil Affairs we went shopping for a bit.  Maya needed shoes, clothes, and diapers.  I had asked for sizes from the orphanage but I overestimated her size.  She is wearing an 18-24 months.  It is also colder here that I thought so we needed warmer clothing and a cap for her.  I told our guide I wanted cheap.  I told her I bought all of my girls clothing at home at a thrift store or consignment and never paid full price.  She took us to an area where a Children's Hospital is located.  There was at least a block of all children's related shops.  I was able to get shoes for $8 US a pair and two outfits which had the heavy padded pants, top, and jacket for around $10 US each. We returned to the hotel.  Daddy brought lunch back from Pizza Hut! OK never in my life in the US have I seen noodles from Pizza Hut with tenacles and other unidentifiable objects! 

The girls napped.  I must share this beautiful photo.  Mary Bailey is watching Maya Grace sleeping.  

We met our guide late in the afternoon to travel to the Police Department which is where you go to apply for a passport.  The waiting area was full of other adoptive families as well.  We were not allowed to take photos in the building.  We returned to the hotel and I took the girls to the outdoor play area at the hotel.  I was able to see Maya's gross motor skills at work.  She can run and climbed on the little stairs up to the slide .  Billy had the camera with him so I did not get any photos.  We went out and walked around the hotel and went to Watson's and 7/11.  Daddy went back to Jusco and bought more noodles for dinner.  We called Nana and chatted with Andrea.  Oh, and Mr. Greg called!  It was an awesome yet very different Christmas Day in the People's Republic of  China. 

Monday - Gotcha Day!

It is 5:05 am on 12/26 as I am writing this post.  Everyone else is still sleeping.  I am one blessed woman today.  I would not trade my life for anyone else's in the world.  My heart is full.

On Monday morning prior to leaving for the Civil Affairs office my emotions were all over the place.  With Mary Bailey and Anneli's adoptions I felt pure excitement and a little nervousness.  With Maya Grace I felt excitement but over-riding that was much nervousness and a major amount of anxiety.  The feeling was very different.  I discussed my feelings with Billy and he was feeling the same way.  I think the difference was that I did not know what to expect.  Mary Bailey and Anneli were 11 months and 10 months at the time of their adoption. They were healthy children.  Maya Grace is older and is a child with special needs. I think the unknown was at the base of my feelings. The closer the time to leave came which was 2pm the more anxious I became.  Prior to walking out the hotel door we all four joined hands and prayed for God to be present with us and to thank Him for the "gift" that we were about to receive.  Mary Bailey asked for a "group hug" and left our hotel room and proceeded to the lobby.

We met our guide and traveled in a van to the Civil Affairs Office.

It was such a wonderful feeling returning to the same building where we saw Mary Bailey for the first time.  Mary Bailey is from Guangdong Province as well.  The room had been redecorated but still the same.  There were around twelve other families there who were receiving their children as well.  We had to complete a few forms and sign our names.  We had to write a brief statement as to why we wanted to adopt Wang Xiao Xing and that we would never abandon, abuse, or discriminate against her.  There were families from the US, France, and Australia who were receiving their children. One family from Australia had waited in the NSN program and had been waiting over six years for their daughter.  Many tears of joy were witnessed in that room.  There were also tears of fright from the children.   Maya Grace was not present when we arrived.  We waited and waited and Billy paced and paced.  (Rachel if you read this you will laugh! You know your Daddy's normal nervous/stressed/anxious behavior).   After what seemed like an eternity we learned that the orphanage workers and children were delayed by traffic. Other families were leaving and yet we waited.  We along with one other family who was receiving an 11 yo from the same orphanage were the last ones there.  We were watching the entrances very closely.  FINALLY an elevator opened and there was our Maya Grace, the 11 year old girl, and the orphanage workers.  My heart went straight to her the minute I saw her. All fears, doubts, and anxiety immediately vanished.  I bent down to speak to her but I was told that she had vomited on the way there so the workers whisked her off to the restroom to clean her.  Billy had the camera so the first shot of her was exiting the restroom area.  As you all have likely seen on Facebook she came sporting a headband with "fake" brown curly hair.  She looked absolutely adorable in her multi-layers of clothing and long hair!  She was holding all of her earthly belongings in that one red bag.

I wanted to immediately scoop her up and hold her but knew it would frighten her.  The girls and I stooped in the floor to talk to her.  She was turning into her nanny and did not want to come to me.

The nanny handed her over.  I held her and she screamed and cried. We walked over and sat on the sofa.  The nanny tried to comfort her for a few minutes and then walked away.  Maya's eyes were searching the room for her.  She did not try to get out of my lap but was arching her back and screaming.  It was absolutely gut-wrenching. Billy walked away.  He can never stand to see a child cry.  After about fifteen minutes the nanny walked back over.  Maya remained in my lap and stopped crying.  Although horrible to witness the crying was a very healthy sign.  It should that she had an attachment to the nanny.  If she had shown no signs of grief this would have been concerning.  The nanny gave her a photo album which is one that we had sent to her via a care package.  She started showing Maya Grace the pages.  She looked at our photo and pointed and said "mama" and "baba".  They had obviously prepared her as best they could.  She knew our faces. In the album were photos of several of her orphanage mates.  She pointed and called them by name.  She never cried from that point on.  We had taken Gerber puffs and she started eating those.  The nanny obviously has much love and concern for the children. She asked if she could have our contact information and asked that we please stay in touch with them.  A little girl Ruthie was recently adopted by a family in Illinois.  The nanny asked if I knew how Ruthie was doing.  This mom had sent a message for me to give them so I told her.  The nanny said that she hopes all children from Huadu SWI can form a group and come back and visit in the future.  I pick up vibes easily from people and am usually fully correct.  This nanny gave me a very warm feeling and obviously has a very kind heart. She went over Maya's schedule with us and answered all of our questions.  (All communication was done via our awesome guide Sarah).  The nanny and other workers asked to take "family" photos.

*Females in the red and white coat are nannies.  Sarah our guide is in the black coat.

I held Maya Grace in my lap on the way to the hotel.  Car seats are not required in China.  I pulled out my cell phone to take a photo and was viewing it.  She immediately reached for it and put her little finger on the screen and made the scrolling through photos option! This little one has experience with a cell phone. We returned to the hotel and Maya Grace immediately started playing with the toys.  We brought a set of Ikea stacking cups and she went right to work playing with them.  Mary Bailey and Anneli were so excited! They were all over her. She only cried one time and that was when Mary Bailey took my iphone from her.  Billy walked to Jusco and brought back noodles and dumplings.  He also bought formula for her which she was being given by the orphanage.  She ate very well.   I bathed her and she preferred standing and not sitting in the water.  I put her in her pjs and gave her a bottle and she was off to sleep at 8:30p.  She slept all night long beside me without waking until 6:30am.  She sucks two of her little fingers while sleeping.  I can't tell you how amazing it feels to finally have her.  I know God is likely tired of hearing me say "Thank You".

We had prayed and asked others to pray that her heart would be prepared for us and that her grief would be minimal. Our prayers and yours were heard.  For this we are so extremely grateful. Love to you all and Merry Christmas!

Sunday

I am writing this on Monday morning at 7am in China.  We will receive Maya Grace in less then eight hours. I hope I can continue to blog in detail so that I can have a chronicle for her of our journey.  So to Sunday!
Breakfast buffet again.  We met a sweet family from Australia.  They are here adopting their second daughter from China.  They will be at the Civil Affairs Office the same time as us.  Their other daughter is with them and she is ten.  She and the girls had a nice conversation during breakfast. Hope to connect further with them.

Being that I am who I am and need much order Billy took the girls to the hotel playroom while I went back to our room to re-organize and straighten.  While straightening I packed the bag I will take with us to Civil Affairs with a few small toys and snacks for Maya.  That was a moment that made it seem truly REAL.  Billy and the girls returned and we went out walking again.  If I do not drop a pant size while here I will be shocked! I love the exercise.  I wish we lived in an area where you could walk regularly in your daily life and not lead the sluggish life that many Americans live. Billy is taller than 99% of the people in China so I feel very safe with him.  We truly went out exploring.  We went up alleyways and in residential areas.  We found a small playground/exercise area in a courtyard.  Two little children spotted the girls and their mother brought them out to play.  They obviously enjoyed practicing their English.  They kept saying "Hello" and "How are you?".  The girls said a few things in Mandarin to them and they seemed to understand.  A man came by and exercised for a few minutes.  He had an adorable dog which the girls wanted to pet.  The man looked very nice and dog looked very clean and healthy so I let them.  We saw men sitting on the side of the road making brooms.  It was a short but nice glimpse into daily China life.

 *We found the girls caps at the everything 10 rmb store.  No more clothes police for us!

We returned to the hotel at 2pm as our laundry was being delivered.  For those traveling our laundry was picked up and returned in less than 24 hrs.  It smelled SO good and fresh when returned.  The cost was $26 for three days of soiled clothing for the four of us.  Billy's blue jeans were the bulk of the cost.  We had instant noodles for lunch.  There is a hot pot in the room.  I had taken storage containers for Maya's snacks which we used to eat the noodles from.  I just put the dry noodles in the container and poured the boiling water over them.  Then let them sit for a few minutes and they were perfect. We will venture back to Trust-Mart to buy more.

We met our guide in the lobby and obtained a taxi to drive us to the church for Mass.  There is a Catholic cathedral here called Sacred Heart.  The taxi dropped us off a few blocks away and we walked through an extremely crowded bustling wholesale market.  There were many vendors on the side of the road preparing food.  It was very festive in appearance with multiple Christmas decorations being for sale.  We turned a corner amidst all of this chaos and saw the breathtakingly beautiful cathedral.  It was built in the late 1800s.  *Sarah our guide is on the right in the black jacket.

There were masses of people standing inside the doors and taking photos.  They were obviously just onlookers.  We arrived early and the rosary was being said.  The beauty of the church is stunning.  To find Jesus in the midst of China was such an amazing experience.

This was definitely a cultural experience.  The English mass is held at 3:30pm on Sundays.  From our vantage point in the church over half the people in attendance were African males.  After mass I questioned our guide and she told me that there is a very large population of Nigerians in Guangzhou who come here to trade.  There were many Asian people in attendance as well.  Our guide told us that Chinese are not prohibited from attending religious services which had not been my understanding.  The church was literally packed.  People were sitting on light blue plastic stools in the aisles.  There were people standing.  The choir sang beautifully.  The rich soulful African male voices were beautiful.  Offering was collected into a bright red fishing type bag tied on the end of a very long bamboo pole.  The universality of the church was evident with few exceptions.  At the end of the service there was an explosive round of applause.  When the priest said "the mass is ended go in peace to love and serve the Lord" the people thrust their hands in the air and made pumping motions. Oh and as in all of China with pedestrians and with drivers there are NO lines.  In American we start in front and go by rows to receive the Eucharist. We realized quickly that you must stand and push your way into the line.  Upon leaving mass it was horrid.  There were lines of beggars on each side with tin buckets.  The beggars on the street had upset and frightened Mary Bailey so I could only imagine what this was doing to her little heart.  I had her hand.  I looked straight ahead and walked as fast as I could go get through them.  I wish there were no hurting needy people in the world.

We left the church and took a taxi to an awesome book store.  We needed Christmas gifts for our children.  I am not sure of the name of the bookstore but there is a multi-storied pastel colored elementary school directly behind it.  The third floor is the children's department.  They had many Chinese/English books, activity sets, etc. I would have loved more time to browse this store.  It was dark and getting late.  We rode the subway back to the hotel.  The hotel was only one stop away. I think we could easily return to the book store alone via subway.   Billy went to the Jusco deli and brought noodles and dumplings back for dinner.  We were all asleep by 8pm.

It is now 7:46 in China on Monday, Christmas Eve.  Counting down the hours to Maya Grace!!

Saturday

We woke on Saturday to our fabulous view from the 15th floor.

We once again went to the breakfast buffet.  It is wonderful having this complimentary meal daily. After breakfast we ventured out to the playground which is located behind the pool on the 4th floor of the hotel. We stayed less than fifteen minutes due to the weather.  It was very cool and windy.  

We returned to our room for our laundry pick-up which our guide had arranged.  We then ventured outdoors. The high temperature for the day was only 55F.  The wind made it appear colder.  On our last two trips to China the weather was 100 degrees plus with humidity beyond anything we have every experienced living in the Deep South.  In the past it was unbearable hot in the day time. This change is actually very pleasant.  We walked down the sidewalk to the left of the hotel.  There is a McDonald's/Pizza Hut combo and a Subway a little farther down for those less adventurous in eating local food.  

                               LOVED this sign outside of a bar - "21/12/12 YOU ARE SAVE"

We spotted the Tekila's Mexican Restaurant which seems to be a favorite among adopting families. Being a Saturday the streets were more crowded.  We were trying to find the Jusco store which is a Japanese owned chain of department stores.  After asking numerous people to help us when we did not speak Chinese and they did not speak English we decided to return to the hotel.  I asked a man at the front desk for directions to Jusco.   He scolded me for having the girls out in only a thin jacket.  (I had only brought their fleece jackets thinking that is all they would need.)  He said, "Too cold girl outside.  Girl need thick coat.  You no walk.  You take taxi."  Another much younger male employee said, "You walk. Only ten minute." Older man said "No too cold girl.  Take taxi." So we took the taxi!  

                                                                        JUSCO

Jusco is a higher end store than the Trust-Mart which we visited the previous day.  I would describe it as a cross between a higher end department store and a Target.  Several parents we had met in the hotel lobby told us about the store and we wanted to go to pass time.  When leaving the Garden hotel you will see a Starbucks across the street.  Beside the Starbucks is a building with Peace in the name.  You walk straight down and the Jusco is on the left.  It is multi-leveled with escalators to each floor.  We realized on the way that we needed "coats" for the girls to avoid further scrutiny.  We located the children's department.  They had the most amazing and colorful shoes on display and beautiful children's clothing.  I could have done some major shopping if our finances here were different.  I was once again reminded how many people are in China.  As I was looking at the children's shoes there were at least six sales ladies in one small area.  They were more than eager to help us.  I kept trying to say "just looking" but none knew English.  As I walked past displays in the clothing various sales ladies picked up items showing them to me and then holding them up to the girls.  Picture Macy's, Belk, etc.  where you have to seek and search for help and then it is usually only minimal.  They could learn from these people!  We found several coats on display and finally found two that were adorable and reasonably priced around $26 US each.  They say "cute baby" on the front and MB was less than thrilled about that but hey she will be warm.  As is usual in China you chose your item and the clerk hand writes a receipt.  You take it to the cashier.  You pay then return to the salesperson and show her the paid receipt and then you are given your purchase.  I guess these sweet ladies thought my children were cold too! They started cutting the tags off the coats and putting the coats on the girls.  They motioned for me to put the other jackets in the shopping bags.  OK, got it China kids must be bundled.  We looked through the toy department.  It had very nice high quality toys and dolls.  New coats! 

We went exploring up another set of escalators.  We found a Dunkin Donuts.  We had a caramel latte and the girls had a donut.  While sitting we were offered various juice samples.  Not real sure what type of juice but the workers were eager for us to try it.  China definitely does not half-do things.  I have never seen donuts in American like these! 

We then ventured to the public restrooms.  MB got her first experience using a "squat" toilet.  She came out with her pants still dry so it was a successful experience! LOL It probably helped that she had on yoga length pants.  

We then saw a store across the corridor from the Dunkin Donuts and we ventured inside.  The girls still had some of their own money and they wanted to look.  It was a variety type store.  We did not see any prices.  After asking numerous times "How much?" and being told "Ten".  We realized that every single item in the store was 10 rmbs.  We love our Dollar Tree at home and excited to realize we had happened upon the Chinese version.  10 rmbs is equivalent to $1.61 US.   Upon leaving Jusco we noted that they had a deli on the first floor.  We purchased noodles and dumplings for lunch for less than 20 rmbs - around $4.  We returned to the hotel to eat. 

Since being scolded about our children's lack of clothing and me having the girls in yoga sets with MB's being short Billy was convinced they needed warmer pants if we were to be out longer. The only pair of jeans I had brought them were sent to the laundry.  We ventured in the MASSIVE Guangzhou Friendship store.  Their children's department was amazingly overwhelming and EXTREMELY expensive.  We were able to find someone who spoke enough English to help us with jeans for the girls.  Amazingly we found some at a reasonable price. If there had been a thrift store here I would have headed that way.  It pains me paying full price for anything.  If anyone is coming to Guangzhou soon make sure and check the temperatures and pack appropriately.  

We did a little more walking and then went to dinner.  Several families had recommended The Paddy Field which is behind the hotel.  It is out the back of the hotel on the Japanese consulate side and to the left.  It is on the right side of the street.  The food was excellent and servings large.  It was pricey on our budget and we will not return.  Had we known the prices before hand we would not have gone.  We each had a steak sandwich which came with fries, salad, and an onion ring.  They had excellent iced tea.  We drank it and were fine. They have a children's menu and Anneli ordered a pizza and Mary Bailey had spaghetti. 

We were all asleep by 7:30pm!